im beyond the point of being sick of the people in my grade that i used to call my friends...i honestly just dont care that much anymore. i still talk to them, because they're there- they're everywhere i am, it's impossible to separate myself from them, which might sound overly dramatic, but it's true nonetheless. their fighting is really, really stupid. it's really much better when you're looking at them from an outside viewpoint- thinking of them AS them and not 'us' and almost feeling sorry for them...although, who am i kidding, i would love to be friends with them if they didnt not care about me and didnt generally suck as much as they do- but seeing as they are like that, it's refreshing to know that i DONT NEED THEM. i have friend who do care, and thank God for them, really. there are things about my friends that upset me occasionally, of course, but they're just little nitpicks and annoyances, and i can get over that. and let me once again thank God for them.
i dont want to look back on the past few years with regret, feeling sorry for myself because i went without these real friendships for so long- i am trying not to do this. look toward the future, and all that shit.
anyway, tomorrow is senior night, with the people i just complained about- there may be tailgating unless it rains (the weather's supposed to be awful!) and then after the game, we're supposed to be seeing the texas chainsaw massacre- which would be LAST on my list of movies to see- and going out to eat. ill probably go- emma's going. i hate that vague 'im not really invited, or im invited but only because i heard about it' sort of feeling though. i should be used to it by now.
you know what song really annoys me? that freaking harder to breathe song by maroon five. omg that song SUCKS. yet im listening to it at the moment..ohmigosh my veins are popping out of my hands. they do that sometimes when ive been typing for too long...is this the first sign of carpal tunnel syndrome? CARPAL TUNNEL, my God! im reading this book called A Heartbreaking Work Of Staggering Genius by Dave Eggers, and i think im starting to adopt his writing style a little. i always do that when i read a book, which is why i dont like reading nicholas sparks as much (why the hell do i always read him, then?) because, honestly, his writing style isnt that great. anyway im almost done with the book, and then i need to find something else.
friends <3
ash
rach
nika
skank
jess
mere
bri
shell
kelly
laura
jamie
kris